Feed your faith

It’s been nearly a year since I last posted.  I simply had no time to do anything other than study.  Nestus call it the year from hell and it is an apt description! This year I studied toward my STA (Standard Theory in Accounting) certificate, or simply the honors degree in Chartered Accountancy.

When I chose it five years ago, I wanted to do something that could make me feel intelligent again after becoming a bit zombie-like working for the government.  So I chose to study what I always thought I should have studied, only the most difficult version thereof.  So I did Chartered Accountancy, and it worked for the clever feeling need.  Up until today that is.

I’ve worked so hard this year.  I’ve put in everything humanly possible.  I studied, worked out questions, slept very little, drank a lot of Omega 3 pills to help my concentration, studied again, everyday, consistently, tirelessly.  All of it to be able to pass this exam at the end of the year.  And then today I wrote the second paper on accounting…  It was horrible, horrid, nightmarish, simply terrible…  Because I couldn’t remember how to do the first question and then I tried the second one when I was so flustered I could not think, and then I got confused about the time I had left and rushed unnecessarily, only to find that I had an hour more than I thought!  So I calmed down and tried to do everything, went back to do the first question, decided to do it the way I did the practice questions and manage to finalize the paper in the allocated time.   But I was so flustered, I am so worried that I would have made endless unnecessary mistakes and that I very possibly could fail this paper!

When I got home afterward I ha a bit of  hysterics, but Nestus managed to calm me down,  I went through the questionnaire again, decided that I did what I could and I am certain my approach toward the first and most difficult question were right.  (I’m certain, it doesn’t mean it is right, my knowledge seem to be less than I thought!)  So I calmed down and tried to remember I this happened after previous exams…. and it did!

Last year during the final paper I did a 25 mark question for which 37 minutes were allocated, than I realised it was wrong, went back, took another precious twenty minutes and redid the question.  I also did not do a lot of work that was part of another question – which I realised when I got home!  But, just like now we had prayed, we prayed the whole year, I begged and asked and prayed that the Lord will help me and He did!  I passed that exam with distinction despite the fact that I made such a mess of the paper!

One of my old school friends posted the following on facebook:  If you feed your faith, doubt will die of hunger.  For now I have to feed my faith, and hope it will carry me through the next three subject.  Then I can only trust that God, the greatest Accountant, will help me pass this year.  (He must be a great accountant – He knew how to reallocate our debt (sins) to a more creditworthy debtor – Jesus, and then He wrote out of the books! – Incredible!)

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.